Iruka came home after a long and tiring day to find someone had tracked dirt and leaves across the living room and into the hall. Not a lot of it, just a few crumbs of dry mud, a few flakes of broken brown cellulose. One brilliant vermillion maple leaf, all spindly serrated edges and delicate veins, stood out starkly in the middle of the polished wood floor. He bent over to pick it up, a beautiful little piece of the season that had wandered in on a draft or fluttered down from a cape as it swept by. He could still feel the chill of nights spent crouched in the tree that had borne it clinging to it, and the dampness of November mist, sticky and somehow sad, despite the loveliness of the leaf.

It meant, of course, that someone was in his home. Someone who had been out in the dirt and the trees and the cold. Someone either too tired or too careless to cover his tracks. Someone, he hoped, who was the person he had been waiting for.

He followed the subtle trail of debris into the hall, where it stopped at the closed bathroom door. No light spilled under the frame. He leaned cautiously against the wood, listening for sounds from within, feeling for the energy pulse that would tell him a living person was inside. What he heard was a slow drip of water into a full tub. A tiny whisper of air. The barest flicker of a familiar chakara. He slid the door open.

"Kashi?"

"Shhhh"

"What?"

"Shhhh. We're hiding."

Iruka turned to find the light from the hall glinting on the dark water in the tub. Sopping wet silver hair and a pair of pale, bruised knees broke the water's surface.

"What do you mean we're hiding? Who's hiding?" Iruka asked kneeling next to the tub and facing its occupant.

"We are. You and I." Kakashi's voice sounded just ever so slightly odd.

"Who are we hiding from?" Iruka reached a hand out toward Kakashi's face, to brush the hair back, and Kakashi jerked away so fast he almost hit his head on the wall. A pale hand leapt out of the water and snared Iruka's wrist in an icy, iron grip.

"Kakashi?" Iruka was alarmed. "This water's freezing!" He looked down and noticed more of the pretty little maple leaves floating there.

"Don't tell. I came to see you," Kakashi hissed.

"I'm not telling anyone. Are you alright? Why is the water so cold?" Iruka reached up and snapped on the light over the sink, which made Kakashi flinch and tug down hard on the hand he still held captive.

Iruka slid forward on his knees, reaching out with the other hand to grab at Kakashi's shoulder. He pulled the man towards himself, feeling his heart race as he tried to get a grip on chilled, slippery skin.

"You're getting out of the water. Now." Iruka used his best Voice of Authority and shoved his hands under Kakashi's arms, lifting the dripping man from the bath.

Kakashi could have fought back. Could have pulled Iruka into the tub, for instance, or evaded his grasp. But there was a reason he had dragged himself to Iruka's house, right? And wasn't it because Iruka would do the right thing? He let Iruka pull him to his feet, watching the red leaves swirl in the eddies around his calves.

"Don't tell," Kakashi whispered against Iruka's chest, and Iruka just shook his head and wrapped a towel around the shivering man.

Kakashi leaned against Iruka, grateful for his warmth, and stared down at the leaves, watching some break into fragments and dissolve into liquid swirls, while others kept their perfect, five-fingered forms. He traced a moving red path backwards to discover that he was adding leaves to the bath, drop by liquid drop. Then Iruka was kneeling and squeezing him in a way that hurt and asking him something, and the leaves stopped falling.

"... how long ago? Was it poisoned? When did you get here? Were you in the cold water because it was poisoned? Kakashi answer me!" Iruka shook the jounin and pressed hard against the gash in his side and stared at the ugly pile of bloodied, muddied uniform with sticks and leaves and a set of dogtags that Kakashi shouldn't have had.

"Don't tell. Don't tell, Iruka. Please don't tell. Let me stay here just a little while and then I'll go," Kakashi whispered through chattering teeth. "Let me stay. Hide with me here. We can hide in the leaves."

Iruka sucked in a shaky breath when Kakashi called his name. "You don't have to go anywhere. You can stay here. It's safe here." He pulled Kakashi out of the tub, half lifting him, and guided him into his bedroom, easing the still shivering man onto his back on the bed. "I'm just gonna bandage this, and then you're gonna drink some tea with medicine in it, and then you can sleep here, alright?" And he started to work on his friend and lover, smearing ointment into the wound and wrapping gauze around his side. His voice and motions were calm and soothing, the opposite of the turmoil gripping him within.

For the first time in days Kakashi relaxed. Right. This was why he'd come here. Because Iruka was certainly skilled enough to treat a relatively minor gash, and would probably have all sorts of poison antidotes on hand, being a teacher. Iruka would understand why Kakashi couldn't go in and face a debriefing yet. Why he didn't want the hospital patching him up. Why he didn't want to turn in the tags that had once hung around the neck of his teammate. Why his mission, a success, could feel so much like a failure.

Iruka finished bandaging and turned down the blankets, tucking them around the pale, naked body in his bed. Then he brewed the tea and brought it in. "What antitoxin, Kashi? Wake up and tell me, and then you can sleep."

"Doesn't matter." Kakashi barely moved, barely mumbled his reply.

"It matters to me! Tell me what kind of poison they used and snap out of it. You came to me for help, so you're going to accept my help." Iruka's eyes narrowed, and his color rose. He shook Kakashi again, hard.

Kakashi opened his eyes and looked at Iruka, surprised he was making such a fuss. He reached out one pale, still chilled hand, which the chuunin grabbed and crushed to his chest.

"Feel my heart? It's still beating. You told me life mattered as long as this kept beating!"

Kakashi started to push Iruka away, but Iruka took advantage of his lover's exhaustion and pulled him up against his body, holding him tight.

"Please, Kakashi, please tell me what antidote to use." Iruka's voice was suddenly rough, and Kakashi clung to him with all the strength he had left in his arms.

"802. They were from Mist. Use 802," Kakashi rasped, and his voice broke. "I used 802 on Kenichi, and he would have made it, but the bastards..." He stopped, digging broken fingernails into Iruka's hair and back, and shook with convulsive jerks, silent shudders passing through his frame.

Iruka held him until he could breathe quietly. Until his hands loosened and his shaking stopped. Until Iruka could trust his own voice again. Then he gently placed a pillow behind Kakashi's back, and poured a vial of amber liquid into the steaming teacup. "Here, drink this. Are your hands and feet tingling at all?"

"A little," Kakashi whispered, his voice used up. "Only been a couple hours. Got in the cold water right away..."

"You should have just gone to the hospital, you know."

"You weren't there."

"I wasn't here, either!"

"I waited."

"You could have di-"

"No. It's not that bad. I'm- I'm okay." Kakashi tugged at Iruka, pulling him down next to him on the bed. Don't say that, Iruka. Don't say that, and it won't be true. He gulped the rest of the bitter tea mixture down and set the cup aside, then shifted a little stiffly and pulled Iruka into his arms. "I'm fine. Just a little cut."

"Shhh, stop talking. Your throat sounds raw." Iruka raised a hand to brush Kakashi's hair back, and this time he didn't flinch away. The damp silver locks fell off to the side exposing the scarred Sharingan eye, which was red-rimmed and squeezed mostly shut. "Does your eye hurt?"

"Little bit," Kakashi whispered. "Don't worry about it."

"Shhh." Iruka brushed a finger over Kakashi's lips, and Kakashi kissed it. Iruka looked up with a question in his eyes, and Kakashi angled his head down and kissed him full on. A possessive, almost desperate kiss.

Then he broke away, taking a sharp breath in, and stared into Iruka's eyes. Stared as if Iruka were somehow unexpectedly in his arms or might vanish into thin air, a mere hallucination. Iruka stared back and saw need there. A need that Kakashi would never admit to. Not even to himself.

"Sleep, Kakashi. You're beyond exhausted. I'll stay with you." Iruka peeled the blankets back and slid under them, taking Kakashi into his arms. The jounin resisted at first, and whimpered almost unconsciously when the movement hurt his side, then let Iruka have his way, draping himself limply across his lover's body, clinging to Iruka's shoulder and pressing his face to his chest. The slow, steady thudding of Iruka's heartbeat was hypnotic, pulling Kakashi into sleep before Iruka had even turned out the light.

In the darkness, listening to the subtle rasp of Kakashi's breaths, Iruka held him. He stared into the blackness, watching imaginary maple leaves drift through the air. With every leaf that fell, he silently mouthed the words, "Namu Amida Butsu..." Refuge in the Amida Buddha. Refuge. Iruka prayed for the soul of Kakashi's teammate, for Kakashi, and for himself, "Grant us refuge, Amida Great One. Namu Amida Butsu. Namu..."

END

For Winter.

Special thanks to Winter, Kiki, Laura, Momo, Bite, Telos, and Eloquence for beta reading.

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